Yesterday was a quieter day and the sticky skies eventually paper-weighted my soul. When the thunder rolled - so did that weight and I could just let some thoughts be thunk.
He's not going to be back later... What if I didn't do enough - love well enough? ... That hovering nearness might not last.... It's just me now-heading this family.... And I decided - yes - it is a decision! - to give these thoughts air and let them go. Why should they put down roots? They are real - they are felt. They do sting. But I choose to hold even thoughts loosely... I was loved... I loved... I am loved... And I will be loved.
This thought too is free - but dances round my ears anyway.